Saturday, November 13, 2010
Photos I Love (from our summer months)
Monday, November 8, 2010
More Brave
Because I am a mother, I am automatically a different person. I don't know how it happens, but I know the change actually reverses when I am not around my kids. For example: When I am home alone, I am likely to lock myself in my bedroom because I am worried that there might be a man prowling through the house at any given time. However, when the kids are asleep in their beds, I NEVER think about things like that. I walk around my house in the pitch black dark without a single fear ever entering my mind. Also, whenever I have to get blood drawn I get nervous, my heart pounds, I talk too much, I can't bear to look at the needle, and I am very close to acting like a baby. But last week I brought my kids with me for my maternity check up and my midwife drew some blood for the glucose test. They were right there in the room with us and when she got the needle out it was as if she had pulled out a pen to take notes with, or something equally as boring. I really didn't care. I watched the entire thing, and it didn't hurt, didn't bother me a bit. She even had to fish for the vein that rolled. She might as well have been taking my temperature. And this all happening with my kids watching. So I suppose my kids make me a more brave, more confident person and this without any deep self analysis or applied parenting theories. I have to be a strong foundation for them in a scary world, as so I am. That is that. And yet it seems a miracle.PS We have had a great fall.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
An 'Isaac' Post
I love my little man Issac. There is just something magnetic about his personality. I have often said it is an inner sense of self confidence. He sees the world clearly and makes himself known.
In addition to being adorable, these photos also provide a quick summer review. The above photo was taken at Long Beach where we had our Young Reunion. (Yep, our claim to fame is that we are related to Brigham Young with pioneer blood in our veins).
This is Isaac's reaction to a mosquito bite on his forehead. (No this did not happen during one of Dillon's boxing lessons) It was swollen comletely shut for a while.
Isaac couldn't quite make it through dinner at the Conway/McDonald camp out one night. Fell asleep right at the table.
In fact that happened more than I would like to admit. I have always been pretty strict about my kids getting enough sleep. And here is is crashing at dinner once again. Those long summer days just take it out of you!
Our backyard is a wonderful place, but it is also a very dirty place. To be sure, bath times increased over the summer!
Looking back on this post, it seems that Issac spent the summer dirty, bitten, and tired, but I promise you, he had a great time too!
In addition to being adorable, these photos also provide a quick summer review. The above photo was taken at Long Beach where we had our Young Reunion. (Yep, our claim to fame is that we are related to Brigham Young with pioneer blood in our veins).
This is Isaac's reaction to a mosquito bite on his forehead. (No this did not happen during one of Dillon's boxing lessons) It was swollen comletely shut for a while.
Isaac couldn't quite make it through dinner at the Conway/McDonald camp out one night. Fell asleep right at the table.
In fact that happened more than I would like to admit. I have always been pretty strict about my kids getting enough sleep. And here is is crashing at dinner once again. Those long summer days just take it out of you!
Our backyard is a wonderful place, but it is also a very dirty place. To be sure, bath times increased over the summer!
Looking back on this post, it seems that Issac spent the summer dirty, bitten, and tired, but I promise you, he had a great time too!
Tree Fort and other updates
I was so impressed with Eve today. I just plopped a corn on the cob down on her plate with a mental "good luck honey" and busily started eating my own corn. Hey, a pregnant woman can't be expected to go hungry, right? Eve got busy on that corn right away. There was barely a kernel left by the time she was done! This girl loves to eat, there is no question.
Now let me just say that I love our house. It is cozy and comfortable, but I wouldn't call it particularly remarkable. However, I LOVE our backyard and it is is about to get even better. Dillon has started on a tree house perched on the trunk of one of the mammoth trees we have back there. He spent all saturday on it and confessed to me that it was one of the best saturdays he has had in a long time. Who doesn't love a tree fort? And building one is even better.
Eli and Isaac are Daddy's big helper and can't wait till the platform is safe enough for them to be able to get up there and do some hammering!
And I just had to put this cute photo of Isaac in because, why not? I bought a super fancy camera from a friend yesterday (she gave me a great deal) and this is one of my first photos. Not award winning, but they can only get better from here.
And for those of you who are curious, yes I am home schooling Eli this year, as an experiment, and so far so good. We are all having a lot of fun. I am starting a blog about it, to track our progress. It will probably be private so let me know if you want to check it out and I will make sure you are allowed.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
The Best Kind of News, and, An Odd Tradition
Yep, our hens are finally laying eggs. This is good news, but not the best kind of news. I've got a different kind of egg in my basket...That's right folks, number four is on the way! Wooo-hooo! Give it up for the Eugenio's and their efforts to populate the world with adorable babies. We will be welcoming the little guy (or girl) mid-January. I am three months along and enjoying a slacking off of miserable early pregnancy woes and anticipating those first baby kicks. We are compiling our list of names for people, especially grandparents, to grimace at and, who knows, maybe this time we will go through with one of them. Maybe this will be little Zephyr or Lincoln or Atticus or.... some other name we haven't thought of yet. But if we follow our current trend we will have to use on Old Testament name that starts with a vowel. Not so easy. We may end up with a little Orpah or Obediah. Just kidding folks. But anyway...
So I thought I would post photos of each of the four times I have found out I was pregnant simply because we started the strange tradition and it's kind of interesting. I realize that not one of these photos is flattering, (perhaps that is why I did not lead with them), but real life moments rarely are, wouldn't you say?
I think these photos are interesting in a historical sense, too. Home pregnancy tests. There may be a reader or two who squirms that I am holding up a picture of what a good friend of mine lovingly refers to as a "pee stick." I'll bet our daughters will just have to breath on something, or rub a test strip on their foreheads. Who knows?
So this is 2004 when we lived in Utah. I found out I was pregnant with Eli and was ecstatic. Dillon went into a kind of shock from which he did not fully recover until after Eli was born.
This is pregnancy test number 2. As you can see, Eli is a thriving little chunky man at this point. This was on my birthday, August 18, 2006. We celebrated with Thai food take out. A great day. Both Dillon and I felt happy and ready.
Pregnancy number 3, March 2008. Surprise! We were living in our little duplex in Puyallup. I was happy, at first, then terrified because Isaac wasn't even one yet! And three, as we all know, is a lot bigger than 2 when it comes to children.
And here we are in May 2010. I had an extra test laying around from years before and just decided to take it. Why not? my period was a few minutes late. Another surprise, but this time, no terror. It immediately felt right. And it also immediately felt like the last one. (Though we reserve the right to change our minds) What a wonderful thing it is, knowing that soon our entire family will be here together. I can't wait to meet the little sweetie.
So there you have it. I am officially announcing it to the world, or to the 20 readers or so who frequent my page. Same diff!
Friday, June 4, 2010
Why I Am Considering Public School
For me, there are two ways to look at public school. One is through a historical lens, and the other is in the context of American life today.
Over the course of my research into home schooling, I have come to realize that compulsory public school is a relatively recent institution. It has existed less than 200 years. (Our church, interestingly, was organized twenty years before the first compulsory education law in 1852 in Massachusetts. Alaska was the last state to pass such a law, in 1929). Two hundred years ago, kids were learning at home, and most were learning quite well. They also learned from the community with apprenticeships and the like. Public Schools are a modern development and have become so ingrained in our culture that they are a fact of life. For us, the certainties of life include not just death and taxes, but school as well (David Guterson).
However, before public school, it was only the rich kids who were able to attend schools: expensive private schools. It is the American ideal of equal opportunity that lead to public education. Why should the rich have access to schools and thus greater opportunity for careers and advancement, the achievement of the American dream? The opportunity to become whatever you want to become. Sure education is compulsory, but it is also free. Immigrants whose kids need to learn English and American culture are guaranteed the chance!
Schools have done wonderful thing for equality. In fact, equality seems to be the main stamp upon public schools, their identity and purpose. "No Child Left Behind," right? These are wonderful, American ideas. In fact, during the civil rights movement, schools were at the front lines of the battle. Public schools have accomplished much and represent much to us, as Americans. By sending my kids to public school I would be supporting those ideals and by being an active and involved parent, I would be doing my part to improve them, and thus improve education for all of America's children. Home school looks like an undemocratic thing to do, in this context. It looks like a shrugging off of so many things struggled for. The problem is, I don't really believe that.
Public school has served an important purpose. But it has become a surprisingly inflexible machine for all its youth. Efforts to help public school change and adapt to match the pace at which modern life changes and adapts have simply failed. Our schools look pretty much the same as they did thirty years ago and yet our modern lives DO NOT. I have come to believe that home school can become an important part of American education and that public schools should evolve to include the option and support home schoolers. I think this is the logical modern path and should not be resisted. No, I do not believe that more that, say ten percent of families will ever home school, but I do think they should be a welcome and regular part of the modern education scene. Regularly visible in the public schools themselves. The problem with treating everyone the same is that we are not all the same. The other half of the American ideal, that compliments equality, is the importance of the individual.
OK, so I have argued my way out of sending my kids to school simply because it is a part of American identity, or because of historical value. Although both are important, they aren't important enough. This leaves me to think about the every day reality of school itself. Moving out of the theoretical and into the literal. And this is where I start to feel real yearning to see my kids get on the yellow bus. (Thanks to Rebecca for being honest about the sadness she felt on the first day of school when her kids didn't.)
I am going to list these thoughts in no particular order and many of them I will present simply, without elaboration.
1. I do not want to control my kids. I want them to have secrets! I want them to have private lives!
2. Over the last month, I have had many online conversations about home school and have come across many opinions and all degrees of passion. The entire spectrum from "I love home school" to "I HATE it." And this has been fun for me! I have always enjoyed the debate, the give and take of ideas. I like to hear what people have to say. As the sole teacher of my kids I will offer one opinion: mine. I see this as a tragedy. A classroom has the potential to contain thirty different perspectives and world views. I don't want them to miss out on that.
3. Teachers. These can be inspired individuals who can touch the lives of my children and open their eyes to all kids of possibilities and see in them thing sometimes a mother's love can make her miss.
4. I do not wish to shelter my kids from the world.
5. I want my kids to take part in a shared American experience. This may sound like a contradiction, since I ruled out public school's value as an American tradition way up at the top of this entry. Logically, that isn't where school gets its value, but personally, it seems sad to think of my kids never having to memorize a locker combination or stand in a lunch line. It's just something we all share, and I imagine it ties us together a bit.
So there are about five reasons. Five reasons I want to send my kids to public school. Are the big enough? Are they insurmountable? Difficulties with home school seem more easily overcome than difficulties with public school, yet this begs the question as to parental control, does it not?
Finally, I believe in God and have a personal relationship with him. I believe that he has an acute interest in our lives. I have researched and studied, discussed and pondered and will continue to do so, but feel confident that the ultimate decision will be made with divine guidance.
(One more thing, for anyone who is curious, Dillon, my husband, Homecoming King, was on the home school band wagon the first time I mentioned it! I think it is mostly because he trusts me to make the right decision and do a good job, Oh the pressure!) Oh and thanks for reading, I welcome any comments.
And a picture, because pictures make things more fun!
Over the course of my research into home schooling, I have come to realize that compulsory public school is a relatively recent institution. It has existed less than 200 years. (Our church, interestingly, was organized twenty years before the first compulsory education law in 1852 in Massachusetts. Alaska was the last state to pass such a law, in 1929). Two hundred years ago, kids were learning at home, and most were learning quite well. They also learned from the community with apprenticeships and the like. Public Schools are a modern development and have become so ingrained in our culture that they are a fact of life. For us, the certainties of life include not just death and taxes, but school as well (David Guterson).
However, before public school, it was only the rich kids who were able to attend schools: expensive private schools. It is the American ideal of equal opportunity that lead to public education. Why should the rich have access to schools and thus greater opportunity for careers and advancement, the achievement of the American dream? The opportunity to become whatever you want to become. Sure education is compulsory, but it is also free. Immigrants whose kids need to learn English and American culture are guaranteed the chance!
Schools have done wonderful thing for equality. In fact, equality seems to be the main stamp upon public schools, their identity and purpose. "No Child Left Behind," right? These are wonderful, American ideas. In fact, during the civil rights movement, schools were at the front lines of the battle. Public schools have accomplished much and represent much to us, as Americans. By sending my kids to public school I would be supporting those ideals and by being an active and involved parent, I would be doing my part to improve them, and thus improve education for all of America's children. Home school looks like an undemocratic thing to do, in this context. It looks like a shrugging off of so many things struggled for. The problem is, I don't really believe that.
Public school has served an important purpose. But it has become a surprisingly inflexible machine for all its youth. Efforts to help public school change and adapt to match the pace at which modern life changes and adapts have simply failed. Our schools look pretty much the same as they did thirty years ago and yet our modern lives DO NOT. I have come to believe that home school can become an important part of American education and that public schools should evolve to include the option and support home schoolers. I think this is the logical modern path and should not be resisted. No, I do not believe that more that, say ten percent of families will ever home school, but I do think they should be a welcome and regular part of the modern education scene. Regularly visible in the public schools themselves. The problem with treating everyone the same is that we are not all the same. The other half of the American ideal, that compliments equality, is the importance of the individual.
OK, so I have argued my way out of sending my kids to school simply because it is a part of American identity, or because of historical value. Although both are important, they aren't important enough. This leaves me to think about the every day reality of school itself. Moving out of the theoretical and into the literal. And this is where I start to feel real yearning to see my kids get on the yellow bus. (Thanks to Rebecca for being honest about the sadness she felt on the first day of school when her kids didn't.)
I am going to list these thoughts in no particular order and many of them I will present simply, without elaboration.
1. I do not want to control my kids. I want them to have secrets! I want them to have private lives!
2. Over the last month, I have had many online conversations about home school and have come across many opinions and all degrees of passion. The entire spectrum from "I love home school" to "I HATE it." And this has been fun for me! I have always enjoyed the debate, the give and take of ideas. I like to hear what people have to say. As the sole teacher of my kids I will offer one opinion: mine. I see this as a tragedy. A classroom has the potential to contain thirty different perspectives and world views. I don't want them to miss out on that.
3. Teachers. These can be inspired individuals who can touch the lives of my children and open their eyes to all kids of possibilities and see in them thing sometimes a mother's love can make her miss.
4. I do not wish to shelter my kids from the world.
5. I want my kids to take part in a shared American experience. This may sound like a contradiction, since I ruled out public school's value as an American tradition way up at the top of this entry. Logically, that isn't where school gets its value, but personally, it seems sad to think of my kids never having to memorize a locker combination or stand in a lunch line. It's just something we all share, and I imagine it ties us together a bit.
So there are about five reasons. Five reasons I want to send my kids to public school. Are the big enough? Are they insurmountable? Difficulties with home school seem more easily overcome than difficulties with public school, yet this begs the question as to parental control, does it not?
Finally, I believe in God and have a personal relationship with him. I believe that he has an acute interest in our lives. I have researched and studied, discussed and pondered and will continue to do so, but feel confident that the ultimate decision will be made with divine guidance.
(One more thing, for anyone who is curious, Dillon, my husband, Homecoming King, was on the home school band wagon the first time I mentioned it! I think it is mostly because he trusts me to make the right decision and do a good job, Oh the pressure!) Oh and thanks for reading, I welcome any comments.
And a picture, because pictures make things more fun!
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Why I Am Considering Homeschool
Most of my friends and family are aware that I am studying the idea of home school as an education for my children, a lifestyle for our family, and a career choice for myself. I want to post a little of my thought process so far, for those who are curious, and for those who may have some insight for me. The decision making process, of course, started with facing public school for my kindergartener this fall and a consideration of all the options. Turns out there are really three options: public, private, and home school. (Private school was pretty quickly ruled out because of cost and the number of kids we have.) That leaves public and home school as our options and I must admit, I get a little nervous thinking about either of them.
There are many many problems with public school. I could probably go on and on about them, taking from my experiences as a student and as a seventh grade teacher: Large classrooms where teachers are forced to teach to the middle, leaving some kids in the dust, and others bored. Grades that are arbitrary and mean nothing, teachers that are allowed to teach year after year, who, simply put, just shouldn’t teach, wasted time (didn’t we all feel that), the teaching of skewed values, the group think that evolves, etc. However I think that going into these reasons is unproductive. These are the reasons that I initially looked into home school. If I didn’t find something in home school of potential worth to me and my family, the case would have been closed, discussion over. But that has not been the case. I also don’t want to make public schooled families feel like they have to defend their choice. They certainly do not! My choosing home school would not be a condemnation of anyone who chooses otherwise. Who can know what is right for families but families themselves?
In truth, it was the idea of a different kind of family life that first excited me. As it is, Dillon and I keep our evening schedules as open as possible and make family time a priority. Unstructured family time. But our kids aren’t in school yet. With kids attending public school I imagine a typical school and work day unsatisfying and unsustainable for us. I expect kids to come home from school, and then head off to whatever extracurricular or church activity is planned. Cram homework in, and dinner and all that’s left is bed time. What’s wrong with that? You might ask. Nothing, but Dillon and I are unhappy with a family life that is too full of things, even good things. We don’t do well with rushing or being overscheduled, left without any time for just being together. Home school kids can get all their education and activities done with plenty of time to spare for spontaneous activities. Ideally home school will be a couple of hours a day year round. Awesome! The modern lifestyle is a rushed and harried one. I recently read a great book by Lisa Rivero called the Home School Option: How to Decide When it’s Right for Your Family. In it she said, time is a “unique benefit of homeschooling…. Time to work slowly, time to think, time to focus on a single idea rather than multi-tasking, time for self-knowledge and reflection, time to question the world and wait for the answers” (Rivero) All of these things seem wonderful to me.
The flip side of the time issue is the sacrifice I will personally have to make to teach my kids. However, I will already be spending hours a day helping kids with homework as well as reeducating them on things I rather they didn’t learn at school (hallway sex Ed, for example). I will also NOT enjoy taking all of my kids to the grocery store every time. In addition, I worry about my own goals of getting a masters and writing fiction but realized I can accomplish my goals right alongside my kids, and be a great example to them in the process. Perhaps this could even be a great stepping stone to one of my ultimate long-term goals: starting a private or charter school.
Socialization is a home school can of worms and it seems to be a thorn in the side of homeschoolers. Homeschoolers insist that critics are beating a dead horse but the stereotypes persist. (Ok I have to laugh at all the clichés, but I just can’t take them out.) Just this week I heard a teenager say, “I just met a really hot guy but he is home schooled so there is potential for some social awkwardness there, we’ll have to see how it goes.” This is just the reality of how home school kids are perceived. However, I find it hard to believe that public school really prepares kids for the world. I echo an idea in Rivero’s book when I say that the public school teaches kids to fit in and be popular. Are these really important life skills? There is a difference between learning to live in society and being socialized. I am not interested in my kids learning how to conform to the ideas of the group before they decide for themselves. Don’t we all breathe a little sigh of relief when we leave high school and realize how much room there is in society for people of all kinds? Perhaps home schoolers are a little odd! Their quirks and oddities could be indications of self directed minds (Rivero). I agree with Rivero that we should focus on accepting ourselves, not on being accepted by others and that will lay the foundation for true friendships. It seems that at public school education takes a back seat to what clothes you wear and who you talk to at recess or during breaks. But here I am talking about the ills of public school, when I said I wouldn’t! If I choose home school, I would plan for my children to be out of the house every day interacting with kids and adults of all ages. As I have researched, I have realized that homeschool does not mean never-leave-the-house school. I will teach the core knowledge at home but I would require music, sports, volunteer work, as they got older, as well as home-school co-ops and any other opportunity that came our way. Home school kids can also go to public school for band, choir, sports, and other fine arts. There are so many possibilities. Perhaps instead of home school it could be called community education (Rivero).
One of my favorite things about home school is that there are no grades, no competition and thus, no labels. I want my kids to be self directed. I would like them to study an idea for its own sake, not as a means to a standardized test (Rivero). I, myself, am pretty conditioned to work for the grade and follow instructions. It is hard for me to accomplish things without someone setting a deadline for me. I want my kids to have ownership. No us against them mentality. There will be no need to “work the system” if the are in charge of the system. Kids at home can really go at their own speed and not be judged for it. I wonder how many people hate reading as adults because they were in the slow group in first grade. I want my kids to have the confidence to be real individuals. I also want them to retain their childhood for as long as they desire. I find it an odd phenomenon that kids grow up too fast, knowing about and dealing with adult problems, and yet they remain stuck in adolescence into their twenties. I think home school can combat that.
I have thought a great deal about student directed learning and wondered how kids will learn what they need to learn without adults to show them. I have worried about kids not being exposed that passionate teacher who can light a fire if interest in something they have never thought of before. Still, those teachers are teaching what they love, students learn on a borrowed flame. What if students could learn what they wanted to learn? When I was a teacher, I taught the books and kinds of writing that I liked. My students had to conform. What if their fire came from within?
Oddly enough, I also believe that kids should have to do thing they don’t want to do. However, we can’t force kids to do anything. If we want do be successful in life, we have to be able to make ourselves do unpleasant things. I don’t want to change four dirty diapers a day but I do it. I do it because I love my kids and because I have a long term goal making sure they are happy and healthy. I think that kids will do math they don’t like in order pursue an ultimate goal of being a scientist, for example, if we carefully help them see the big picture. One on one, we can help our kids find out who they want to be and where they want to go, then guide our kids towards their goals, even through the subjects they detest. Teachers do not have this luxury. How many of us were unable to see the big picture when we were kids? We had no buy in and resisted learning subjects we saw no purpose in. “Why do I ever want to learn this if I am never going to use it?” I think home school is especially contusive to student buy in and ownership because parents can help their kids see all things as stepping stones to greater goals.
One of the reasons I hesitate to choose home school, lets be honest, is discomfort with going against the social grain. I don’t wan to be labeled and judged. Sometimes I think that choosing a natural birth with a midwife was the end of my normalcy. I wonder why home birthers are often anti-immunization, home schoolers, who eat only organic whole grains (I am kidding a little). But once you choose to question an institution as big as American hospitals and birthing practices, nothing is safe, If hospitals aren’t the always the best place to have a baby, then why would public schools always be the best place to educate them. So I take you on a bit of a tour through my thoughts. Honestly, I would choose home school right now if it weren’t for these few persistent fears. Fear of social discomfort, fear that my kids will be bored stiff, or worse, damaged somehow, fear that I won’t be able to juggle it all and be happy, fear of disappointing others. At some point I will make a decision. If I choose home school, I know that my reasons for home schooling would be different from almost any other family’s reasons. And that’s the wonderful thing about making choices for our families; we have to right to make our choices even if the only reason is that “it feels right.”
So now you have had a tour of my thought process. If you have lasted this long, thanks for joining me. I do this for myself more than any other reason, to organize my thoughts and continue towards a decision.
There are many many problems with public school. I could probably go on and on about them, taking from my experiences as a student and as a seventh grade teacher: Large classrooms where teachers are forced to teach to the middle, leaving some kids in the dust, and others bored. Grades that are arbitrary and mean nothing, teachers that are allowed to teach year after year, who, simply put, just shouldn’t teach, wasted time (didn’t we all feel that), the teaching of skewed values, the group think that evolves, etc. However I think that going into these reasons is unproductive. These are the reasons that I initially looked into home school. If I didn’t find something in home school of potential worth to me and my family, the case would have been closed, discussion over. But that has not been the case. I also don’t want to make public schooled families feel like they have to defend their choice. They certainly do not! My choosing home school would not be a condemnation of anyone who chooses otherwise. Who can know what is right for families but families themselves?
In truth, it was the idea of a different kind of family life that first excited me. As it is, Dillon and I keep our evening schedules as open as possible and make family time a priority. Unstructured family time. But our kids aren’t in school yet. With kids attending public school I imagine a typical school and work day unsatisfying and unsustainable for us. I expect kids to come home from school, and then head off to whatever extracurricular or church activity is planned. Cram homework in, and dinner and all that’s left is bed time. What’s wrong with that? You might ask. Nothing, but Dillon and I are unhappy with a family life that is too full of things, even good things. We don’t do well with rushing or being overscheduled, left without any time for just being together. Home school kids can get all their education and activities done with plenty of time to spare for spontaneous activities. Ideally home school will be a couple of hours a day year round. Awesome! The modern lifestyle is a rushed and harried one. I recently read a great book by Lisa Rivero called the Home School Option: How to Decide When it’s Right for Your Family. In it she said, time is a “unique benefit of homeschooling…. Time to work slowly, time to think, time to focus on a single idea rather than multi-tasking, time for self-knowledge and reflection, time to question the world and wait for the answers” (Rivero) All of these things seem wonderful to me.
The flip side of the time issue is the sacrifice I will personally have to make to teach my kids. However, I will already be spending hours a day helping kids with homework as well as reeducating them on things I rather they didn’t learn at school (hallway sex Ed, for example). I will also NOT enjoy taking all of my kids to the grocery store every time. In addition, I worry about my own goals of getting a masters and writing fiction but realized I can accomplish my goals right alongside my kids, and be a great example to them in the process. Perhaps this could even be a great stepping stone to one of my ultimate long-term goals: starting a private or charter school.
Socialization is a home school can of worms and it seems to be a thorn in the side of homeschoolers. Homeschoolers insist that critics are beating a dead horse but the stereotypes persist. (Ok I have to laugh at all the clichés, but I just can’t take them out.) Just this week I heard a teenager say, “I just met a really hot guy but he is home schooled so there is potential for some social awkwardness there, we’ll have to see how it goes.” This is just the reality of how home school kids are perceived. However, I find it hard to believe that public school really prepares kids for the world. I echo an idea in Rivero’s book when I say that the public school teaches kids to fit in and be popular. Are these really important life skills? There is a difference between learning to live in society and being socialized. I am not interested in my kids learning how to conform to the ideas of the group before they decide for themselves. Don’t we all breathe a little sigh of relief when we leave high school and realize how much room there is in society for people of all kinds? Perhaps home schoolers are a little odd! Their quirks and oddities could be indications of self directed minds (Rivero). I agree with Rivero that we should focus on accepting ourselves, not on being accepted by others and that will lay the foundation for true friendships. It seems that at public school education takes a back seat to what clothes you wear and who you talk to at recess or during breaks. But here I am talking about the ills of public school, when I said I wouldn’t! If I choose home school, I would plan for my children to be out of the house every day interacting with kids and adults of all ages. As I have researched, I have realized that homeschool does not mean never-leave-the-house school. I will teach the core knowledge at home but I would require music, sports, volunteer work, as they got older, as well as home-school co-ops and any other opportunity that came our way. Home school kids can also go to public school for band, choir, sports, and other fine arts. There are so many possibilities. Perhaps instead of home school it could be called community education (Rivero).
One of my favorite things about home school is that there are no grades, no competition and thus, no labels. I want my kids to be self directed. I would like them to study an idea for its own sake, not as a means to a standardized test (Rivero). I, myself, am pretty conditioned to work for the grade and follow instructions. It is hard for me to accomplish things without someone setting a deadline for me. I want my kids to have ownership. No us against them mentality. There will be no need to “work the system” if the are in charge of the system. Kids at home can really go at their own speed and not be judged for it. I wonder how many people hate reading as adults because they were in the slow group in first grade. I want my kids to have the confidence to be real individuals. I also want them to retain their childhood for as long as they desire. I find it an odd phenomenon that kids grow up too fast, knowing about and dealing with adult problems, and yet they remain stuck in adolescence into their twenties. I think home school can combat that.
I have thought a great deal about student directed learning and wondered how kids will learn what they need to learn without adults to show them. I have worried about kids not being exposed that passionate teacher who can light a fire if interest in something they have never thought of before. Still, those teachers are teaching what they love, students learn on a borrowed flame. What if students could learn what they wanted to learn? When I was a teacher, I taught the books and kinds of writing that I liked. My students had to conform. What if their fire came from within?
Oddly enough, I also believe that kids should have to do thing they don’t want to do. However, we can’t force kids to do anything. If we want do be successful in life, we have to be able to make ourselves do unpleasant things. I don’t want to change four dirty diapers a day but I do it. I do it because I love my kids and because I have a long term goal making sure they are happy and healthy. I think that kids will do math they don’t like in order pursue an ultimate goal of being a scientist, for example, if we carefully help them see the big picture. One on one, we can help our kids find out who they want to be and where they want to go, then guide our kids towards their goals, even through the subjects they detest. Teachers do not have this luxury. How many of us were unable to see the big picture when we were kids? We had no buy in and resisted learning subjects we saw no purpose in. “Why do I ever want to learn this if I am never going to use it?” I think home school is especially contusive to student buy in and ownership because parents can help their kids see all things as stepping stones to greater goals.
One of the reasons I hesitate to choose home school, lets be honest, is discomfort with going against the social grain. I don’t wan to be labeled and judged. Sometimes I think that choosing a natural birth with a midwife was the end of my normalcy. I wonder why home birthers are often anti-immunization, home schoolers, who eat only organic whole grains (I am kidding a little). But once you choose to question an institution as big as American hospitals and birthing practices, nothing is safe, If hospitals aren’t the always the best place to have a baby, then why would public schools always be the best place to educate them. So I take you on a bit of a tour through my thoughts. Honestly, I would choose home school right now if it weren’t for these few persistent fears. Fear of social discomfort, fear that my kids will be bored stiff, or worse, damaged somehow, fear that I won’t be able to juggle it all and be happy, fear of disappointing others. At some point I will make a decision. If I choose home school, I know that my reasons for home schooling would be different from almost any other family’s reasons. And that’s the wonderful thing about making choices for our families; we have to right to make our choices even if the only reason is that “it feels right.”
So now you have had a tour of my thought process. If you have lasted this long, thanks for joining me. I do this for myself more than any other reason, to organize my thoughts and continue towards a decision.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Crazy Moments
I was sitting with my in-laws the other day having a nice conversation about this and that when I happened to look out their window into the backyard. I laughed to myself about the general chaos that a puppy can create when set loose on the most unlikely of targets. Dillon's brother Derrick keeps his 100 pound Mastiff puppy back there. This particular puppy, Cuma, is extremely efficient in this adolescent destruction. I couldn't identify most of the things he had descended upon. Just little bits of garbage spaced evenly throughout the yard, like a carefully peppered steak. Ah, puppies. Then I realized, there he was, right in front of the window, he had another victim in his grasp. A white container of some sort? "What is that he's got?" I asked.
"Oh, just some statue," Dillon's Dad replied. I looked closer. Sure enough, Cuma had a hold of a statue of Christ. (Dillon's parents are Catholic and so you are much more likely to find statues of different saints and holy people in their home and yard then the typical Christian household.)
"Oh, that's just wrong," I said, but just sat there and watched. Pretty soon he is getting really excited. Now Cuma is a male dog. Need I say more?
"That's it," I said, getting up, "there has to be a limit." Some things just have to remain sacred. So I had a mission, rescue Christ from the loving embrace of a huge ball of pure muscle. I headed outside and quickly realized easier said than done. This particular bread of Mastiff quite dominate and I couldn't get more than a fingertip on the figure. I had this huge pushy, wiggly, slobbery, jumping, shoving mass to deal with. And that was HIS toy, as far as he was concerned. After a few minutes of playing nice and increasingly beginning to fear for my life I finally got down to business and started yelling at the dog. He backed off a little and I grabbed hold of the plastic statue. Hollow and plastic, I lifted it easily into the air. But then the game was really on for Cuma. As soon as I picked it up he was on me. I had to survive right? Assert my dominance? I started hitting him with that statue for all I was worth. Wham! Smack! Take that, and that! I'll teach you to desecrate sacred things! Pow! Teach you to fear the Lord! Kapow! He was over in his belly in no time. I don't think I could hurt that dog in a million years. He admitted defeat with a look in his eye like, "geez, i was just playin!"
My heroic venture ended with Cuma happily chewing on some other toy and me in a fluster, half believing the dog had nearly eaten me, grasping a faded old figure of Joseph, not Jesus, from an old yard display of the nativity. Ah, the crazy moments of life.
"Oh, just some statue," Dillon's Dad replied. I looked closer. Sure enough, Cuma had a hold of a statue of Christ. (Dillon's parents are Catholic and so you are much more likely to find statues of different saints and holy people in their home and yard then the typical Christian household.)
"Oh, that's just wrong," I said, but just sat there and watched. Pretty soon he is getting really excited. Now Cuma is a male dog. Need I say more?
"That's it," I said, getting up, "there has to be a limit." Some things just have to remain sacred. So I had a mission, rescue Christ from the loving embrace of a huge ball of pure muscle. I headed outside and quickly realized easier said than done. This particular bread of Mastiff quite dominate and I couldn't get more than a fingertip on the figure. I had this huge pushy, wiggly, slobbery, jumping, shoving mass to deal with. And that was HIS toy, as far as he was concerned. After a few minutes of playing nice and increasingly beginning to fear for my life I finally got down to business and started yelling at the dog. He backed off a little and I grabbed hold of the plastic statue. Hollow and plastic, I lifted it easily into the air. But then the game was really on for Cuma. As soon as I picked it up he was on me. I had to survive right? Assert my dominance? I started hitting him with that statue for all I was worth. Wham! Smack! Take that, and that! I'll teach you to desecrate sacred things! Pow! Teach you to fear the Lord! Kapow! He was over in his belly in no time. I don't think I could hurt that dog in a million years. He admitted defeat with a look in his eye like, "geez, i was just playin!"
My heroic venture ended with Cuma happily chewing on some other toy and me in a fluster, half believing the dog had nearly eaten me, grasping a faded old figure of Joseph, not Jesus, from an old yard display of the nativity. Ah, the crazy moments of life.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Almost Ready
The coop just needs some paint and a door latch and the chickens can move in. At least they know where they are going to be living. It is still up in the air for us. Yes, we bought this house just over six months ago and have felt happy and at home since day one. Still, we may be moving to Portland to follow available work in Dillon's company. We are heading down for a visit this weekend. Dillon will have his final interview and we will check out the area. Nothing is set in stone yet. There are a couple of options that would allow us to stay here in Puyallup, close to family, and we could keep the chickens. Otherwise, Optimus Prime and Rock may be needing a new home. Such a bummer after all of Dillon's hard work. Doesn't the coop look great?
Sunday, January 31, 2010
We've Got Chicks!
That's right folks. We are the happy owners of six adorable chicks as of yesterday afternoon. Now, who doesn't like a fluffy little chick, right? But honestly, a few minutes at the petting zoo and we are all ready to move on. However, knowing these little ladies are mine and that in a few sort months I will be eating the freshest of fresh eggs? Well, that makes them the most awesome, smartest, cutest little chicks I have ever seen. I am quite the determined urban farmer these days.
Pictured above are Optimus Prime, Eli, and Bumblebee. Despite the fact that these bits of fluff are guaranteed to be hens and not roosters, we do have two little boys doing the naming. Our third and fourth chicks are Wolverine and Rock. We have yet to decide on the last two. Any suggestions?
Dillon has been working hard on the chicken coop, in the dark and in the rain, most times. It is almost done and is a pretty fine bit of craftsmanship, if I may brag a little. I'll get some photos later. Thanks Dillon! (This is my mothers day gift from last year. I think he is covered for this year too, don't you?)
Friday, January 29, 2010
Fun With Party Hats
One of the great things about having kids around is that they don't know the rules or the script about how things are "supposed" to be. Isaac figured those party hats were more like a dinosaur costume. He wouldn't stop untill he was wearing them all. This photo is from New Years Eve. We had our own little family party. All but the baby made it till midnight and it felt good ringing in the New Year together. Actually, even baby Eve got a quick new years kiss from us all at midnight. She looked about blearily and then went back to sleep.
Eli had a bit of a temper tantrum when I tried to make him go outside and look at the fireworks. "These fireworks are pretty and you WILL look at them and you WILL bang pots and pans and you WILL have fun even though it is FOUR HOURS past your bedtime." OK, so parents can be a little unreasonable sometimes. Ahhh, memories!
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